I admit that when I realised it impossible to get a fish bowl back home today, I felt a bit disappointed. I don’t know what happened and how it happened. I even can not remember where the original idea came from. It turned out like this: At some points in the past a couple of weeks, we suddenly wanted to get a pet fish, then we all wanted a glass fish bowl instead of a fish tank. And then my mind has been loaded with a beautiful picture where a couple of golden fishes swimming among the green plants in a glass jar, water shinning and reflecting the lights, I am there watching and shouting like a child “yahooooooooo…I have a pet, a living one that I am taking care of!” Isn’t this weird? I have no idea how to take care of any animals. If my memory serves me right, I only had a couple of times that golden fishes died in my hand. Mom bought them for me when I was quite young. I think I might never been a big fan of raising fishes due to the above bad experience. How come I want it so badly at this moment?

Okay, here was the deal: We stopped by a pet shop in Woden today and happened to see an attractive pet fish package worth only 35 dollars (I have to say that the initial idea was just to have a look at the kitties and puppies in cages). The package was offering a cute size glass fish bowl, with coloured gravel, underwater fake plants and a fighting fish. There had everything that I ever wanted for a pet fish. So, we spent a little time discussing the possibility of getting one of those in front of one of our favourite fighting fishes which was sapphire blue colour and looks very energetic. We decided to buy it. After we had the lunch and were ready to head off back home, we popped up to the shop again and intended to really get the thing. The girl working in the shop was very nice and was preparing everything for us, and I, as a beginner of pet caring industry, had to ask her some very basic questions like how much and how many times I have to feed it a day and what kind of water condition I need to keep, just in case I won’t become a fish murder once again J The girl showed me a 15ml medication bottle sized fish food which particularly designed for sub-tropical fish and has a price tag of $9.99 and another water conditioner with a price of another $9.99. I nearly fell off my chair (no, actually I was standing, not sitting on the chair…okay…I nearly died:-). I didn’t expect to spend 55 dollars for a bloody tiny exotic fish which might only live for no more than one year or could die anytime from now on, although I believe food and water conditioner are the most basic things I need for this kind of hobby. I had to say sorry to the girl and walked away but on the way back home, I just can not get it out of my head. I asked myself if I did the right thing. I was going buy a life. Is 55 bucks worth way too much for a real life? What was wrong with me?

Several hours later after I got back home, I settled myself down and started to think rationally. I suddenly came to realise that there was something about this matter actually was the key of all. The fact is, I am not fascinated with the fish, the living thing and my future caring role of the fish. What I am really fascinated with is the underwater setting, the pretty appearance of a swimming pet, swinging green plants and a shinny crystal clear glass bowl. I like to have it at home more than just looking after an animal, and that, is what I wanted and what made me feel so disappointed with not being able to have one.

Trust me, I believe I did the right thing, but also trust me when I say I am thinking an alternative way, as nothing in my mind has changed, I still want it badly